my brother (me) and his roommate Vik

by Feng

 Thebigvik:  its sunny

and sombreros are very effective

idk why you thought i was suggesting a sombrero

 me:  *vikas is carried off by a pair of mexican gryffins

*fading screams


*the end


this is how our conversations are gonna go from now on

 Thebigvik:  i dont know how i feel about that

 me:  *vikas discovers that his chair is actually a black hole

 Thebigvik:  damn!

 me:  *wormhole

 Thebigvik:  back in time i hope?

 me:  *tunneling into space and time he discovers that the world is not as it seems….

 Thebigvik:  3 years back?

 me:  *he zips forward in time

 Thebigvik:  fuck

 me:  *armed only with the knowledge of his utter failure

 Thebigvik:  thats depressing…

 me:  *sadness abounds in the confines of the wormhole

*a single leaf flutters by

*whole seasons pass in the blink of an eye

*an eye which is nonexistant

*vikas realizes he is actually dead

*fade to white

 Thebigvik:  was i murdered by my roommate

 me:  *cue music


 Thebigvik:  in his sleep

 me:  *applause


*standing ovation

*general noise

 Thebigvik:  i like how your applause is part of your movie

its required

 me:  its a meat-film



not meat

 Thebigvik:  or meat

 me:  although….

*vikas discovers that slabs of meat adorn his entire universe

 Thebigvik:  lady gagas?

 me:  *everything that was once his, now meat

*the irony

*blows his mind


 Thebigvik:  tiny amount of applause

not good

 me:  *a single hand

 Thebigvik:  youre declining

 me:  *damn

*its true

*old age strikes like the


*badger’s musk

fuck this

 Thebigvik:  ok